Highs and Lows

My school participated in a Speech contest this Saturday. The contest was a constant source of stress for me, for about the past 3 weeks. I've been spending LOT's of time helping the four students who joined. My school has NEVER had ANYONE attempt something like a speech contest. And though teachers had participated in contests before in their previous schools, this contest was unique. It was made very easy, as kids did not have to memorize their speech or even make it. So no one really could help me.

I made the speeches for them, then recorded my voice, then trained them, then made it easier for them, then re-recorded my voice and trained more and then more. All told I think I spent at least 40 hours NON WORK HOURS on this, not including taking my Saturday off to join them.

In the end one of my students won second place. And the winner of the first place was a college student, from the college that put the contest on, and her teacher was a judge. So I was a bit bitter she didn't get first. But everyone assured me that in the back its ALL politics.

Still, I was happy that all my work in a way paid off. Also in the hall ways I ran into a third year students I hadn't seen in a long time. She is well known to me, I met her last year as a second year when she HATED English. She was the captain of the first club I joined so I often talked to her. But her English WAS so bad, she could not even answer me "What is your name" She couldn't even spell her own name right. But I talked to her a lot, and worked hard to make English fun for her whenever I went to the club.

In the end she really came to enjoy English, and even joined the intensive English course I taught. Due to business and (the teacher who heads the class not liking me =/) I havn't seen her. But in that class I got to know that she was just going to some crappy 2 year college, and then just getting a job. I always told her she could do better. And when I saw her she not only told me "long time no see" (I TAUGHT HER THAT!) but also that she was going to try for Fukuoka College. A proper four year one. I almost cried, I thought wow I am making a difference, not just making their English better, changing lives.

I know I am not the only factor, in fact I may have just been a small factor but I KNOW I somehow played a part in it. In fact it was the first thing she told me, I know she told me it because I always told her "Why not a four year college"

It almost made me think I want to stay another year. But, honestly I have been really busy and my school has not been so forgiving. I have been spending a lot of after school time helping the kids, and taking time off my weekend, but when I desperately needed to go to the doctor they refused to let me take off without taking paid leave. I have very limited paid leave and do not want to use it. So though I really needed to go, I still have not went....

Also a close personal friend died recently, and I guess it's my own fault I don't want to break down and tell the other teachers this. I just suck it up and teach my classes with this smile, then helped the speech kids.

The speech is finally over and I now feel I can relax. I debated starting an English club with the girls who did the speech contest but that would take so much more work due to scheduling.

I am happy I am finally starting to make a difference, but I don't know if it's enough..........