So this Sunday I'm going home..YAY! The bad news is, the ONE things my mom asked me to get her, bunka shishu, this weird things I can't find anywhere but online, will not be procured. Simply due to the fact that I am a procrastinator till the very last, and I so did not order it in time. Argh, I suck! But hopefully I will be able to RUN to Hakata and buy it before I have to RUSH back to make some sort of school end meeting at 7:00. Ahh the silly life I lead here.
Also sadly, I really wanted to take pics with some of my favorite students in Kyudo BUT I forgot my camera. BAH! So I visited them for like 15 minutes (they practiced very little today) and then they were all cleaning up so I decided to make my leave. You'll all just have to get my really ghetto pics from like ages ago. Sadly could not get a picture of the awesome people, or the captain who is super silly. Boo-urns. Also I wanted to stand next to them to show the fact that I am a midget. Most of them are rather tall, and I am sadly short. Not that I am extremely tall, nor is it that no one is short, its just that the ones who are tall are tall and Japanese and skinny. Making me feel lame and extra short =/.
I'll be in Hawaii in two days but will continue to blog, I wonder if I'll get reverse culture shock? For sure I'll be happy not needing to come to work everyday! But hopefully no one will have changed too much. I know I have quite a bit, though old habits do die hard. My older sister went to New York for about the same amount of time I lived in Japan and when she came back she was a much better person but with the year she had gone back to her old ways and it was as if she never changed.
I'm worried about Hawaii, it's people, it seems to encourage stagnation and contentness. People seem to lack drive and are so laid back its scary. In Japan I am still lazy and sometimes find myself just wasting the day away as I would do in Hawaii. But here I am also driven by so many people who just do so much more. I still can't break all my old habits but I truely believe I'm getting better.
Things I've managed to do in Japan:
Eat vegetables : Thats right I am not up to the level of salads and the thought of fresh cripsy vegetables is still revolting to me, but I wont sit there for 2 hours picking out every green onion, nor will I not eat anything with specks of green in it. As long as its been cooked thouroughly enough to make it seem less vegetable like I'm fine...generally.
Become more patient: Not that much better, but still an improvement. I still talk insanely fast with fluent English speakers, but even I am amazed how long I will stand there forcing children to talk to me in Engrish, even how SLOOOOOWWWW I talk to them, though I'll admit it I do sometimes sound like William Shatner when I do this =/. I'll even dumb words down further and further even though I speak some of the best Japanese in the area, and it would talk me 2 seconds to just tell them the word in Japanese. (I get more AHA! when I just use simple English to explain to them)
Get better at Japanese: Not as good as I thought I would, but that's understandable considering all my friends are not Japanese and I never study. But I guess somethings never change.
Make many new friends from different places: I can't belive how many friends I have who are white! It sometimes blows my mind and I sometime think the students arn't getting Internationalized I AM!
Read books: I hate reading and I still can't really enjoy it, but I've read quite a few nonfiction titles. And I've generally come to enjoy it....we'll work on fiction and literature on the next year!
Become positive: I'm a realist true and true but I realize coming to Japan its actually quite realistic to be somewhat optimistic. I often think "Ahh, things are bad..but it can't stay bad forever" I still find the faults in the day but instead of thinking it could be worse, I find myself thinking it will get better. Which I suppose is nice.
Get used to cold: Even people who live in Japan wear less clothes than me, even people in Canada get colder more often than me. My life in my apartment with no heat has made me freakishly immune to the cold. This whole week even though I KNOW it drops below freezing in the morning, I have been sleeping WITHOUT my heated blanket...not that smart but eh. I feel I'm stronger for it...though I fear returning to Hawaii with the freakish heat o.0.
Things I really need to work on the next year:
Play guitar: My god, I said I'd work on this but I so have not. It doesn't help that every other day I think "Why not play ______ instead!" Ugh, if anything I'm going to start drumming, but I still think it will be good to play guitar, I even bought a new shiny pretty one! Argh!
Save more money: I'm really good at saving money compared to everyone else here. But because I resist on big obvious things, (like heat, clothing, bed, comfort) I splurge on stupid.. crane games non stop, random giant bags of stuff I probably don't need but make me think "OH! its a deal!", food and booze. Well I guess that's not that different from my life in Hawaii..
Buy nicer clothes/try and live more comfortably: More like realize I can spend money on it, also spend money on comfort, I'm still unsure why I still sleep in a large sleeping bag..it's beyond strange. Also I sucked it up even when temperatures dropped below freezing IN my apartment with NO HEAT! I really need to get something...
Be less lazy/procrastinating: I can't count how many times I've said I should do this and still bummed on the internet. I often blame the cold (which it is) but really I could do more and I so don't.
Get up earlier!: Granted I get up on time, but everyday its a MAD-RUSH, and its because I do get up early enough but then I say eh I have time and drift off to sleep till its at the point where I don't have time and then have to rush like a madwoman...bah!
Exercise!: I can not believe HOW much weight I've put on in Japan its shocking and disgusting, I paid $1000 on a yearly membership to my local gym I need to use it damn it!
Get better at communication: I can not count the people who I just lose touch with just because I think I'll email them later, I'll call them later and never do. I'm so bad at it! BAH! I try to work on this alot, but I swear I only get marginally better each time, I just hate talking on the phone.
Yikes seems like so much I still need to work on. But I feel I've grown alot, especially living on my own. It's not really living on my own though, since rent is HIGHLY subsidized there is just no struggle even though I only get paid like 2,600 a month. (Wait that's alot) Generally I get paid enough where I don't have to pinch penny's and generally can get what I want when I want it. (though I still somehow deny myself it..) But, I do my own laundry, buy my own food, wash the dishes, go to work, get myself up, insane things I could never do in Hawaii. I wish I was more productive and I could be more, easily. But I've come pretty far from the barely trying at all in life that I used to do. If only I tried from the beginnings I wonder how far I could be right now, but there no changing the past, no time for worrying about what could've been, I can only hope to improve.
So see you all in Hawaii! I'll be jazzed to see how everyone else has changed! (if at all....)
2007年3月20日火曜日
I think I'm turning Japanese
Ok, I almost shaved off my eye brows! I now KNOW I've been in Japan too long. In Hawaii I never wore make up and didn't really even take care of myself. I dressed really ghetto and just excepted that I wasn't that great looking. But in Japan that is just unacceptable, ALSO everyone else is like HOT, so you just feel super lame. And not playing with your hair for like 15 hours a day means your basicly a man. Even they spend at least 10 hours on their hair.
So for a person who is lucky to even comb their hair its a bit of a shock. So I guess I've become more careful on how I look. I actually sometimes wear make up, since I've been doing that I also been staring at my face longer. I realized awhile ago one eye is smaller than the other, but staring at my face I realized my entire right side of my face is less developed somehow, my right jaw is less pronounced and I have less cheek bone on my right side. So it's been making me paranoid, but Oh well those things cant be helped anyhow.
Either way, the eye brows started as in Japan NO ONE has eye brows. The boys dont, nor the girls. My school even does eye brow checks to make sure they have them but alas it does little. So, lately somehow in response I've been plucking my eyebrows EVEN THINNER! And when I do it the student compliment me, like I look beautiful today etc, etc. So I think its been making me go crazy! Finnally I realize that I have like seriously 4 hairs on my left eye brow at one section, and I dont know if they are going to grow back. I want them! So I decided oh if i just shave it off then itll look like I plucked them nicely but still have eye brows! And then I suddenly went OMG, I will be like those eye brow less students who look DAMN scary when they forget their eye brow pencils. I can just imagine myself with a sharpie in the corner! FEAR.
Well moving on with that. Last few days have been nice, since I see second years less they've been really jazzed with my lessons. Also my last lesson went off really well. And I've been hearing more hellos and I love Kristen in the hallways, always nice. Also on the last mountain hike I finally hiked with class 7. I like this class but I also hate them since they are so noisy they often just break down into chaos. But one girl and her friend who are undoubtedly in the bad ass we don't work ever talked to me. Their defacto leader is semi on crack all the time. Shes screaming and having a great time with her horrible engrish, and I really butter them up saying they are doing great etc. And at the end they say to one another in Japanese, I CANT BELIEVE I UNDERSTAND HER! I cant believe she understands us! Wow! This makes me want to study English more! Man I wanted to cry, it makes me really feel like Japan is not wasting their money on bringing me over here. If class 1-7 Yuki, the Yuki who failed music can actual come to want to study english....WOW.
Teachers are leaving, sadness... (One of my JTE's, hes kinda goofy and not reliable but students seem to like him and I am the closest to him of all the ones I teach with) but new students are coming. Things are looking up (minus my eye brows) but I'm still happy to go home. I really have done alot I think so I'm happy to have finished strong. Next year I think I'll do alot better. There were alot of ups and downs and I really had to wonder about Japan. But even though its freezing cold in my apartment and I can't shower and sometime I have no idea whats going on...I feel good to be in Japan now. Yay...now if only my eye brows would grow back in! I promise to treat you better...please grow back T.T
So for a person who is lucky to even comb their hair its a bit of a shock. So I guess I've become more careful on how I look. I actually sometimes wear make up, since I've been doing that I also been staring at my face longer. I realized awhile ago one eye is smaller than the other, but staring at my face I realized my entire right side of my face is less developed somehow, my right jaw is less pronounced and I have less cheek bone on my right side. So it's been making me paranoid, but Oh well those things cant be helped anyhow.
Either way, the eye brows started as in Japan NO ONE has eye brows. The boys dont, nor the girls. My school even does eye brow checks to make sure they have them but alas it does little. So, lately somehow in response I've been plucking my eyebrows EVEN THINNER! And when I do it the student compliment me, like I look beautiful today etc, etc. So I think its been making me go crazy! Finnally I realize that I have like seriously 4 hairs on my left eye brow at one section, and I dont know if they are going to grow back. I want them! So I decided oh if i just shave it off then itll look like I plucked them nicely but still have eye brows! And then I suddenly went OMG, I will be like those eye brow less students who look DAMN scary when they forget their eye brow pencils. I can just imagine myself with a sharpie in the corner! FEAR.
Well moving on with that. Last few days have been nice, since I see second years less they've been really jazzed with my lessons. Also my last lesson went off really well. And I've been hearing more hellos and I love Kristen in the hallways, always nice. Also on the last mountain hike I finally hiked with class 7. I like this class but I also hate them since they are so noisy they often just break down into chaos. But one girl and her friend who are undoubtedly in the bad ass we don't work ever talked to me. Their defacto leader is semi on crack all the time. Shes screaming and having a great time with her horrible engrish, and I really butter them up saying they are doing great etc. And at the end they say to one another in Japanese, I CANT BELIEVE I UNDERSTAND HER! I cant believe she understands us! Wow! This makes me want to study English more! Man I wanted to cry, it makes me really feel like Japan is not wasting their money on bringing me over here. If class 1-7 Yuki, the Yuki who failed music can actual come to want to study english....WOW.
Teachers are leaving, sadness... (One of my JTE's, hes kinda goofy and not reliable but students seem to like him and I am the closest to him of all the ones I teach with) but new students are coming. Things are looking up (minus my eye brows) but I'm still happy to go home. I really have done alot I think so I'm happy to have finished strong. Next year I think I'll do alot better. There were alot of ups and downs and I really had to wonder about Japan. But even though its freezing cold in my apartment and I can't shower and sometime I have no idea whats going on...I feel good to be in Japan now. Yay...now if only my eye brows would grow back in! I promise to treat you better...please grow back T.T
2007年3月16日金曜日
Class Match
In Japan all students have to take entrance exams to get into their chosen High Schools. Its no different for my school, and then all the teachers have to grade them. That essentially takes 2 days, BUT instead of giving the student a bunch of days off they hold class match.
Classes in Japan are segregated highly, student don't move, teachers do. So they become really close to their class....or have basically no friends o.0
So alot of my favorites classes did well... So as a teacher I should be impartial. But I'm not really a teacher so I don't really stay impartial lol! I even decided not to cheer for teams so I wont show my favorites but lo and behold I was cheering on my favorite team in the end.... Oh well...
Sadly two of my favorite classes landed up going head to head and I landed up cheering my obvious love class. Felt a bit bad...my favorite class landed up losing. Their own fault...like alot of classes they made their two teams even. (The classes in Japan are HUGE so they can make 2 full teams for volleyball with subs, and boys can make 2 full soccer teams) I was going to cheer boys soccer, but it was POURING FREEZING rain all day, and the boys had to play in it. Felt bad for them...but not enough to warrent me to go out there o.0
In the end class 4 girls won, (the boys of class 4 also won their soccer matches so that class of rather quiet kids did super well. Who knew the class knows a "zombie", "dead", etc would win! ) they were smart they made their b team absolute crap. I mean so bad they got beaten something like 2-15, 5-15..ouch, and only played one game. (Though not as bad as class 3, their A and B team got eliminated in the ranking first day mtches and didn't even get to play the second day !!) But their A team raped, and I didn't want them to win somehow. I always like cheering the underdog even though I really like their class. Though for some reason I don't like the girl who is the classes defacto leader. Some classes have either one boy or one girl who is the bad ass leader and basically rules the class. In class4 most students are generally shy but this one girl is really not, shes smart too but I already know shes going to be a horror student next year...sadness. Too bad her listening comprehension probably beats some of my JTE's...
It was good over all I got to talk to some of my bad class 2 students, even the girl who is semi hopeless in English. At first she just answered all my questions with OH YES! Regardless if it was a yes or no question..but in time we were communicating...via noises and hand motions but she was jazzed and though shes actually horrible went...Woah I'm doing pretty good here! Also, I probably remember about 100 students names before this but I think I've LEVELED that UP to about 120~ w00t
Also funny, my favorite student is in class 2. Yes that horrible that I say it out so honestly "favorite student" but she is awesome. Shes also a kiss ass, though I hated those types of students in school now that I am a teacher, SHIT! it works.... So her class was doing well, and I was with her other A team class mates cheering them on (they made their teams so well they were basically equal, one over all very well rounded and one with a couple power hitters.) So they are playing a team with some power strikers and the girl in front isn't digging the ball properly and it just deflects off her arm at sharp angles...into my fav students face...three times. Its pretty ouch looking and its in the same spot her right eye area.
So at the third time I go ouch! That sucks! So one of her team mates (who is not a very good student but loves English) says " Ohhhhh.. (mock sympathy sounding) beautiful face....BAM beautiful face..NO beautiful face..hehehehehe." Ouch double harshness, she is rather good looking and even her friends will tease her about being so skinny and being cute etc.
In the second year my favorite class wins, though I don't really watch. It was pretty much a given that they'd win, and like I said before I don't like cheering for the winning team. Class 8 they are..not the brightest but super energetic, and are super sporty! Also the captain of the volleyball team is in there and though shes short has an insane spike! Amazingly the teams that made the top were class 1 (top science class..the class with the least amount of girls, and class 9 the top literature class) You'd think these intelligent students would just suck at sports but they did really well.
I also ran into Reika, a girl I feel somwhat sorry for. Shes in class 1, the class that made the finals and its the science class and most girls in there are...science looking girls. But this girl is really cute, and super shy but seems to generally enjoy English (I think...) So when she saw me she went "OH! OH!....hello..." She is also.....slow in the reaction department, so for Japan that magicaly inhances your cute charm +5. But I feel bad for her because in class she gets teased all the time, for being too cute o.0 Like oh your so cute! Too cute! Oh this is so cute...its like Reika! CUTE CUTE CUTE said in the way that little children like to tease the kid who is fat..as if cute were suddenly a negative o.0. It's weird! But I guess I don't really need to feel bad for her, shes good looking and obviously smart....shit! I can see why they have to bring her down a notch. LoL..strange Japan.
Overall it was really fun, and seeing some of the kids being just such awesome athletes made me want to get back in shape. I dont know why but some girls just didn't have that air of being awesome athletes and alot of them tell me they are awful at sports! Also volleyball is one of my weakest sports (also the sport I twisted my pinkie finger doing, never bothered splinting it either and thus I have a fucked up pinkie) so just knowing they could just destroy me at it makes me for some reason bitter. I want to get in shape and get better at volleyball....I am also silly. So I can see why Japan matches me.
Once again w00t Hawaii Des date in T-minus 9 days!
Classes in Japan are segregated highly, student don't move, teachers do. So they become really close to their class....or have basically no friends o.0
So alot of my favorites classes did well... So as a teacher I should be impartial. But I'm not really a teacher so I don't really stay impartial lol! I even decided not to cheer for teams so I wont show my favorites but lo and behold I was cheering on my favorite team in the end.... Oh well...
Sadly two of my favorite classes landed up going head to head and I landed up cheering my obvious love class. Felt a bit bad...my favorite class landed up losing. Their own fault...like alot of classes they made their two teams even. (The classes in Japan are HUGE so they can make 2 full teams for volleyball with subs, and boys can make 2 full soccer teams) I was going to cheer boys soccer, but it was POURING FREEZING rain all day, and the boys had to play in it. Felt bad for them...but not enough to warrent me to go out there o.0
In the end class 4 girls won, (the boys of class 4 also won their soccer matches so that class of rather quiet kids did super well. Who knew the class knows a "zombie", "dead", etc would win! ) they were smart they made their b team absolute crap. I mean so bad they got beaten something like 2-15, 5-15..ouch, and only played one game. (Though not as bad as class 3, their A and B team got eliminated in the ranking first day mtches and didn't even get to play the second day !!) But their A team raped, and I didn't want them to win somehow. I always like cheering the underdog even though I really like their class. Though for some reason I don't like the girl who is the classes defacto leader. Some classes have either one boy or one girl who is the bad ass leader and basically rules the class. In class4 most students are generally shy but this one girl is really not, shes smart too but I already know shes going to be a horror student next year...sadness. Too bad her listening comprehension probably beats some of my JTE's...
It was good over all I got to talk to some of my bad class 2 students, even the girl who is semi hopeless in English. At first she just answered all my questions with OH YES! Regardless if it was a yes or no question..but in time we were communicating...via noises and hand motions but she was jazzed and though shes actually horrible went...Woah I'm doing pretty good here! Also, I probably remember about 100 students names before this but I think I've LEVELED that UP to about 120~ w00t
Also funny, my favorite student is in class 2. Yes that horrible that I say it out so honestly "favorite student" but she is awesome. Shes also a kiss ass, though I hated those types of students in school now that I am a teacher, SHIT! it works.... So her class was doing well, and I was with her other A team class mates cheering them on (they made their teams so well they were basically equal, one over all very well rounded and one with a couple power hitters.) So they are playing a team with some power strikers and the girl in front isn't digging the ball properly and it just deflects off her arm at sharp angles...into my fav students face...three times. Its pretty ouch looking and its in the same spot her right eye area.
So at the third time I go ouch! That sucks! So one of her team mates (who is not a very good student but loves English) says " Ohhhhh.. (mock sympathy sounding) beautiful face....BAM beautiful face..NO beautiful face..hehehehehe." Ouch double harshness, she is rather good looking and even her friends will tease her about being so skinny and being cute etc.
In the second year my favorite class wins, though I don't really watch. It was pretty much a given that they'd win, and like I said before I don't like cheering for the winning team. Class 8 they are..not the brightest but super energetic, and are super sporty! Also the captain of the volleyball team is in there and though shes short has an insane spike! Amazingly the teams that made the top were class 1 (top science class..the class with the least amount of girls, and class 9 the top literature class) You'd think these intelligent students would just suck at sports but they did really well.
I also ran into Reika, a girl I feel somwhat sorry for. Shes in class 1, the class that made the finals and its the science class and most girls in there are...science looking girls. But this girl is really cute, and super shy but seems to generally enjoy English (I think...) So when she saw me she went "OH! OH!....hello..." She is also.....slow in the reaction department, so for Japan that magicaly inhances your cute charm +5. But I feel bad for her because in class she gets teased all the time, for being too cute o.0 Like oh your so cute! Too cute! Oh this is so cute...its like Reika! CUTE CUTE CUTE said in the way that little children like to tease the kid who is fat..as if cute were suddenly a negative o.0. It's weird! But I guess I don't really need to feel bad for her, shes good looking and obviously smart....shit! I can see why they have to bring her down a notch. LoL..strange Japan.
Overall it was really fun, and seeing some of the kids being just such awesome athletes made me want to get back in shape. I dont know why but some girls just didn't have that air of being awesome athletes and alot of them tell me they are awful at sports! Also volleyball is one of my weakest sports (also the sport I twisted my pinkie finger doing, never bothered splinting it either and thus I have a fucked up pinkie) so just knowing they could just destroy me at it makes me for some reason bitter. I want to get in shape and get better at volleyball....I am also silly. So I can see why Japan matches me.
Once again w00t Hawaii Des date in T-minus 9 days!
2007年3月10日土曜日
youd post this much if you were sick too
So update on the sick. Its gotten better in some ways and in other ways much much worse. So I get up feeling rather goodish my first sleep in a LONG time where I did not get up 3-4 times hacking away. Also it was a nice 8 hour then another 3 hours sleep. Yamato calls to see how I was, which was nice. Good to know people are worried if im alive or not.
So I get up and look forward to the sushi I bought last nite. I was a little worried since I planned on eating it some 12 hours ago but thought refrigeration! But no, I ate half a piece and thought it was a little gross, so I tried one bite of another one but that was bad too, so I tried to eat the tamago the most safe thing, but no I landed up throwing the whole thing out. Also for the dango (mochi on a stick) I bought it was hard as rock and gross... so blah what a waste of food.
I land up drinking a bunch of aquarius (its sports drink) and an apple plus some popcorn in a bag. But soon after an hour of this I feel a bit queasy and I run to the bathroom, its diarrhea. And then again, and again , and again and before I know it Ive drunken the entire 2 liter bottle of aquarius but am debating if I can make it to the store and back without another attack of bathroom.
I feel so lame I organized my ipod a bit (it was only semi dead as in i restarted it and such) But I'm so weak I cant even play guitar, and its really cold for some reason. Its close to noon and yet I can still see my breath in my apartment. So I'm walking around in sweater and long pants with booties on, and I still have to wear a blanket draped around me (something I didnt even do in the dead of winter) So I'm not sure what I'm going to do about laundry, showering (it takes 2 hours to heat and fil my tub and then I need to splash the water onto myself to bath, which I'm pretty sure I don't have the strength for) So right now Japan and my shitty apartment is REALLY kicking my ass right now, I debate crawling back into my sleeping bag and sleeping the rest of the day. But I'm certain I need to rehydrate and I'm sure getting out of that thing to go the bathroom may not work.......
Needless to say I feel like crap.....I don't know if I can make it Sunday, in fact I dont even know if I'll be better by monday...blah.
So I get up and look forward to the sushi I bought last nite. I was a little worried since I planned on eating it some 12 hours ago but thought refrigeration! But no, I ate half a piece and thought it was a little gross, so I tried one bite of another one but that was bad too, so I tried to eat the tamago the most safe thing, but no I landed up throwing the whole thing out. Also for the dango (mochi on a stick) I bought it was hard as rock and gross... so blah what a waste of food.
I land up drinking a bunch of aquarius (its sports drink) and an apple plus some popcorn in a bag. But soon after an hour of this I feel a bit queasy and I run to the bathroom, its diarrhea. And then again, and again , and again and before I know it Ive drunken the entire 2 liter bottle of aquarius but am debating if I can make it to the store and back without another attack of bathroom.
I feel so lame I organized my ipod a bit (it was only semi dead as in i restarted it and such) But I'm so weak I cant even play guitar, and its really cold for some reason. Its close to noon and yet I can still see my breath in my apartment. So I'm walking around in sweater and long pants with booties on, and I still have to wear a blanket draped around me (something I didnt even do in the dead of winter) So I'm not sure what I'm going to do about laundry, showering (it takes 2 hours to heat and fil my tub and then I need to splash the water onto myself to bath, which I'm pretty sure I don't have the strength for) So right now Japan and my shitty apartment is REALLY kicking my ass right now, I debate crawling back into my sleeping bag and sleeping the rest of the day. But I'm certain I need to rehydrate and I'm sure getting out of that thing to go the bathroom may not work.......
Needless to say I feel like crap.....I don't know if I can make it Sunday, in fact I dont even know if I'll be better by monday...blah.
2007年3月9日金曜日
Kristen's pyschedelic freak out
So I've been posting like a mad-woman..and today is no different.
So I got a bunch of medicine from my Dr as I said earlier. So I had taken some just before I slept the night before, but the next day for what ever reasons I didn't take my morning dose till close to lunch. At that point I ate some food and felt a bit dizzy from all the medicine but soldiered onto the rest of the day. I come home around 5 and decide to eat take another dose, take a nap and get up and do all the chores I NEEDED to do. Well I get to sleep a bit later, but I get up at 2...ugh go figure. But I got a bunch of sleep so I think I can just stay up the rest of the night or maybe get a small nap after my chores are done.
So I get up eat something really small and take my 3rd dose of medicine. Maybe its because it was without food, or maybe its because I didn't take this other medicine because I left some at school, but holy crap after one hour (before my laundry was done) the room was spinning. And I felt weird, like I was tripping on e. Like I was freezing cold and when I went into my warm sleeping bed it was the greatest feeling ever! And I had no strength just trying to close my hands was a great effort. I was tripping out hard enough that I couldn't sleep even though the room was spinning.
It was like I was drunk...but without that queasy feeling, and it wasn't as fun as no one else was there. So I decided what else to do but to listen to some psychedelic freak out music, so I put on the only stuff I have 00i00. Which is a mish mash of acid rock and noise, PERFECT. So I kinda just trip out on the music and the sounds just kinda wringing my hands around a hokkairo. It was weird to say the least and even more scary is I'm taking all the medicine again this morning with very little to sleep, I fear my afternoon classes.
I just took it and I'm starting to get that freak out feeling a little right now, but not so bad. I think when I take the medicine I forgot it evens it out a little? Anyway the drugs the doctor gave me are "Sefuzon", "A-sen", "Rizochim", 'hi-pen", "Ebasteru" and "Fusukode" I had taken about 4 of them before but can't remember which ones, so if your ever in Japan and want to freak out on the cheap I recommend one of these. Sadly it was too cold to get a guitar, and really its not like I was going to make freak out music. But interesting experience.
Note: My ipod seems to have completely died, it just had flashes of sadness. I'm hoping its just a really dead battery but signs point to futile doom.
I didn't finish my laundry thus I am wearing these pants for the "gasp" second time! Horror.
I'll be home in 2 weeks! 2 weeks! yay.
So I got a bunch of medicine from my Dr as I said earlier. So I had taken some just before I slept the night before, but the next day for what ever reasons I didn't take my morning dose till close to lunch. At that point I ate some food and felt a bit dizzy from all the medicine but soldiered onto the rest of the day. I come home around 5 and decide to eat take another dose, take a nap and get up and do all the chores I NEEDED to do. Well I get to sleep a bit later, but I get up at 2...ugh go figure. But I got a bunch of sleep so I think I can just stay up the rest of the night or maybe get a small nap after my chores are done.
So I get up eat something really small and take my 3rd dose of medicine. Maybe its because it was without food, or maybe its because I didn't take this other medicine because I left some at school, but holy crap after one hour (before my laundry was done) the room was spinning. And I felt weird, like I was tripping on e. Like I was freezing cold and when I went into my warm sleeping bed it was the greatest feeling ever! And I had no strength just trying to close my hands was a great effort. I was tripping out hard enough that I couldn't sleep even though the room was spinning.
It was like I was drunk...but without that queasy feeling, and it wasn't as fun as no one else was there. So I decided what else to do but to listen to some psychedelic freak out music, so I put on the only stuff I have 00i00. Which is a mish mash of acid rock and noise, PERFECT. So I kinda just trip out on the music and the sounds just kinda wringing my hands around a hokkairo. It was weird to say the least and even more scary is I'm taking all the medicine again this morning with very little to sleep, I fear my afternoon classes.
I just took it and I'm starting to get that freak out feeling a little right now, but not so bad. I think when I take the medicine I forgot it evens it out a little? Anyway the drugs the doctor gave me are "Sefuzon", "A-sen", "Rizochim", 'hi-pen", "Ebasteru" and "Fusukode" I had taken about 4 of them before but can't remember which ones, so if your ever in Japan and want to freak out on the cheap I recommend one of these. Sadly it was too cold to get a guitar, and really its not like I was going to make freak out music. But interesting experience.
Note: My ipod seems to have completely died, it just had flashes of sadness. I'm hoping its just a really dead battery but signs point to futile doom.
I didn't finish my laundry thus I am wearing these pants for the "gasp" second time! Horror.
I'll be home in 2 weeks! 2 weeks! yay.
2007年3月8日木曜日
Sick....but with less doom
So I am still sick, but I went to the hospital and I got a butt load of medicine. In Japan the doctors just look at you symptoms and give you medicine, without even really looking at you at all! Only after i said I was coughing up large chunks of pus that he looked into my throat and said it was swollen but since I had no fever not to worry...WHAT!
Anyhow I'm not sure if the stuff hes given me is working but I realize I'm not drinking enough water. It was also so cold last nite even though I KNEW I needed it I was hesitant to get up....DOOM.
So I had my first second year lesson in a long time, and I had 2-8. All the teachers think this class is dumb...and to be fair my questions and answers were met with alot of blanks stares and calls of MURI! (IMPOSSIBLE!) BUT they were all really good, did what I asked and tried. Which is what I love the most. Also this class has the captain of the kyudo club, shes generally a happy go lucky but slightly....slow girl. What made me really jazzed was when I asked them to take out their name cards. It's been like 2 months since I last saw them and I assumed they'd all have lost it, but no only did a bunch of them have it, that girl (head of kyudo club) who is part of the kinda badass we don't pay attention or work group told her friends (who all mostly lost it) Of course I bring this with me everyday! (In japanese of course) So I was jazzed, I kinda cheated and gave her a stamp for free...but its ok because really I think I talk to her more than I talk to teachers.
So now..on to the DOOM classes. My god why did they cram the 3 worst classes in the grade into one day. Granted class 8 is love (they are considered bad because they don't study and talk alot) but class 7....AND class 5~! Argh, my last class 5 lesson was so fail I think when I went back to the shokuin I wanted to cry. I didn't but I sure felt like it, I mean literally half the class was sleeping and the other half wasnt just talking they had just broken down into MADNESS, and the 2 people who looked like they wanted to try were in the group with the girl who you can't talk to, can't get near, or touch, not just teachers, EVERYONE. So they basicly failed since she kept on screaming at her group to leave her alone..........man that was tough.
After that I think the horror that is ussually class 7 faded from memory. But, that also has a simular girl, who will occasionally talk if shes in a good mood but when shes not...man she gave me a stare that stole a piece of my soul!
Also I am running out of AWSOME mini prizes. I still have like 30-40 pieces left but its in a big box so it looks like not much. =/ So i think I'll run home at some point grab some more trinkity crap (coin purses and crap) and throw it in. Just....11 more classes CRAP...oh well at least I already went though like only 7 doh! Lesson also learned next year I need to revise prize game. I'm not sure what else to throw in, I'll probably at some point go to a UFO catch and get more prizes last time I went I won a bunch of 100 en tiny prizes (cute little plushies, I actually managed to get 3 with one try each! w00t.) But that time I could only manage one big toy out of 10 tries! That was really bad! >< Oh well..... Even though I have a bunch of classes I am already bored!
Anyhow I'm not sure if the stuff hes given me is working but I realize I'm not drinking enough water. It was also so cold last nite even though I KNEW I needed it I was hesitant to get up....DOOM.
So I had my first second year lesson in a long time, and I had 2-8. All the teachers think this class is dumb...and to be fair my questions and answers were met with alot of blanks stares and calls of MURI! (IMPOSSIBLE!) BUT they were all really good, did what I asked and tried. Which is what I love the most. Also this class has the captain of the kyudo club, shes generally a happy go lucky but slightly....slow girl. What made me really jazzed was when I asked them to take out their name cards. It's been like 2 months since I last saw them and I assumed they'd all have lost it, but no only did a bunch of them have it, that girl (head of kyudo club) who is part of the kinda badass we don't pay attention or work group told her friends (who all mostly lost it) Of course I bring this with me everyday! (In japanese of course) So I was jazzed, I kinda cheated and gave her a stamp for free...but its ok because really I think I talk to her more than I talk to teachers.
So now..on to the DOOM classes. My god why did they cram the 3 worst classes in the grade into one day. Granted class 8 is love (they are considered bad because they don't study and talk alot) but class 7....AND class 5~! Argh, my last class 5 lesson was so fail I think when I went back to the shokuin I wanted to cry. I didn't but I sure felt like it, I mean literally half the class was sleeping and the other half wasnt just talking they had just broken down into MADNESS, and the 2 people who looked like they wanted to try were in the group with the girl who you can't talk to, can't get near, or touch, not just teachers, EVERYONE. So they basicly failed since she kept on screaming at her group to leave her alone..........man that was tough.
After that I think the horror that is ussually class 7 faded from memory. But, that also has a simular girl, who will occasionally talk if shes in a good mood but when shes not...man she gave me a stare that stole a piece of my soul!
Also I am running out of AWSOME mini prizes. I still have like 30-40 pieces left but its in a big box so it looks like not much. =/ So i think I'll run home at some point grab some more trinkity crap (coin purses and crap) and throw it in. Just....11 more classes CRAP...oh well at least I already went though like only 7 doh! Lesson also learned next year I need to revise prize game. I'm not sure what else to throw in, I'll probably at some point go to a UFO catch and get more prizes last time I went I won a bunch of 100 en tiny prizes (cute little plushies, I actually managed to get 3 with one try each! w00t.) But that time I could only manage one big toy out of 10 tries! That was really bad! >< Oh well..... Even though I have a bunch of classes I am already bored!
2007年3月7日水曜日
SICK DOOM
I am really sick right now....like just keeping my head up and typing is taking alot of effort. The worst part is in an hour I have to teach 3 classes..... And repeat tommorow and friday... I am really sick right now but I have very little time to do my classes. I thought I was getting better but it suddenly got cold and though the cold does not always have a direct correlation with being sick, its been making my cough worse. I've been getting up at least 3 times a night hacking away so hard, I don't think I'm getting quality sleep. I really shouldve gone to the doctor yesterday when I had no classes, but I really felt I was getting better. Right now I'm so light headed I'm not sure what I'm going to do come class time... But if I were to cancel my classes now, I'm not sure when or if I could finish them. Its the last two weeks of class...its the last lesson for both first and second years! I NEED to get better...I don't think I'll be going to Japanese class today.... I just pray I don't pass out in class.
Edit: Ok, it started snowing but my first few lessons went basicly pretty good. The last class was just so awful. I completely lost my voice from just screaming at them, and during the interview game two boy groups got together so they could look up offensive words on their dictionary and string together nonsensical engrish sentences that were semi insulting... I couldnt get the entire meaning but could get that they were insulting, the looking like a man, something about my ass...yeah fun.
I'm not sure what to do when they are that bad I can't disicipline them and that teachers just sits down the ENTIRE class. Shes basicly given up on them and ignores all the crap stuff they do, and so I'm there where 10 of the students are sleeping, another 15 are just talking, and maybe 5 are trying. At some point during the review game I just gave up screaming and told them next year I hope they all settle down and learn to focus....of course they didnt understand and I wasnt going to force them to. When students don't know words like choice, move, make......argh.
I fear tommorow I teach the two WORST classes in the entire school. These classes make my 1-6 class....almost bearable. Those two are basicly like class 1-6 but with the topper that both classes have two HORROR students that basicly make teaching next to impossible. I'm leaveing at 4:15 my supervisor informed me i can leave from that time, and me staying till 430 is me being dumb. I've been trying to segway my time schedule back to 430 which is what i USED to stay till. But now knowing i can leave even earliar means....I'm going to do that. Especially on wends, when I have Japanese class. A\
Edit: Ok, it started snowing but my first few lessons went basicly pretty good. The last class was just so awful. I completely lost my voice from just screaming at them, and during the interview game two boy groups got together so they could look up offensive words on their dictionary and string together nonsensical engrish sentences that were semi insulting... I couldnt get the entire meaning but could get that they were insulting, the looking like a man, something about my ass...yeah fun.
I'm not sure what to do when they are that bad I can't disicipline them and that teachers just sits down the ENTIRE class. Shes basicly given up on them and ignores all the crap stuff they do, and so I'm there where 10 of the students are sleeping, another 15 are just talking, and maybe 5 are trying. At some point during the review game I just gave up screaming and told them next year I hope they all settle down and learn to focus....of course they didnt understand and I wasnt going to force them to. When students don't know words like choice, move, make......argh.
I fear tommorow I teach the two WORST classes in the entire school. These classes make my 1-6 class....almost bearable. Those two are basicly like class 1-6 but with the topper that both classes have two HORROR students that basicly make teaching next to impossible. I'm leaveing at 4:15 my supervisor informed me i can leave from that time, and me staying till 430 is me being dumb. I've been trying to segway my time schedule back to 430 which is what i USED to stay till. But now knowing i can leave even earliar means....I'm going to do that. Especially on wends, when I have Japanese class. A\
2007年3月5日月曜日
Sick Vacation
So I have my spiffy car, and Friday comes along and on Saturday we are to set off to go to Nagasaki to see the lantern festival. Sadly friday I had an extremly busy day, but was generally happy as all 3 of my lessons went well. Though after my back to back to back classes I had a quick lunch in which I just landed up rushing home to change so I could climb mt. tenppaizan. It was there that I realized a few dumb things.
It had suddenly become freakishly hot and I alwasy thought the students are so dumb why am I the only one carrying something to drink? So with my juice in hand I climb up with the class 3 girls, which is the one class in which I am on more friendly terms with the boys (since they are rowdy and friendly and the girls are less so) So the boys all run up to talk to me, but eventually I try to seg-way to talk to the girls since I had talked with the class 3 boys like on two mountain climbs. (I'm trying to get through all the groups) So after awhile we are basicly running since we have to do some sort of eye brow check (Some rule about students must have eye brows...youd think this would not be a problem but more than a few boys have.....next to no eye brows =/)
So at this point some less in shape students look like they are about to pass out so I start offering them some juice, some accept and one girl who is really bad I basicly just give her the whole bottle. Even then its so bad the final leg of the climb I am dragging her up to ensure she doesnt fall off the mountain. On the way back down I'm popped I am losing my voice from combination screaming at classes and a cold, and I gave away most of my juice so I did something bad and ran away to get some vending machine drinks.
It was then another teacher told me, that drinks are banned untill summer. The students are supposed to suck it up since its cool and they can handle it. Its just insane, I couldnt belive it I mean like 3 girls in just the class I was walking with almost passed out. I thought what horrible rule. I'm not sure what I'm going to do about it but I will continue to break it (since no one told me it was a rule, even though I've bought something to drink with me every mountain climb) and pretend I still dont know because its not only dumb, but if the students can't carry somethign to drink I will surely give them some.
Also Shinnae visits my school and its fun, we go to kyudo club and bug the students. I was highly amused when the super tall awsome Kyudo girl (kayo) finds the shoes shinnae is wearing is really high, shes about the same height as shinnae without the shoes but with them on Shinnae looked much taller. When i pointed this out, she was kinda like CHEATER! Very funny as the girl is ussually SUPER shy and quiet. So I was amused.
So Saturday morning comes and Im feeling REALLY bad. I seriously lay in bed for awhile debating if I really wanna suck it up and go. But I do since if I dig out 4 other people are stuck without a ride. So I head over, and there are MASSIVE delays. We don't get out onto the road untill a good 2 hours later, and while on it I follow the other driver and in short we get pretty lost. (and I'm not even leading!) It gets so bad I land up leading (!!!!!) Of course this makes me nervous as I intended to just follow the other car blindly. So I get frazzled and bitchy and scared, since as you all know I have the world worst direction sense.
The whole trip is ok, but I basicly get sicker and sicker as it wears on, and by the next day I feel kinda like dying. I eventually get a bit better (after a bit of a hurl) and on the way back, I freak out since I'm sick, I don't know where I'm going and there are two back seat drivers telling me what to do. Which is good in a way because...I'm basicly like anti directions.
But I realize a bunch of things, I really need to calm down and stop freaking out when I drive. In Hawaii driving by myself, sometimes I would get lost for 3 hours. Which is pretty insane for an island that is so small you could probably drive around it in 1-2 hours. (well the part of the island with roads...) And I basicly accepted a long time ago I'm really bad at directions and sometimes things like that happen.
But in Japan its way scary, becuase getting lost will not lead you in circles it will lead you to god knows two prefectures away in some god forsaken land. And here there are time constraints, and people are almost always in my car. So I freak out and I don't know what to do and I get angry. I'm kinda sick of this feeling of pressure, as I'm a SUPER laid back person with very very little stress in my life. But, I can't just pretend to live a life with the attitude of, whatever comes I'll handle it. I really need to take hold of my life and steer in on my own. I just ussually let my life flow in the relaxed way that is common to Hawaii. But in the real world such an attitude does not work.
In a way truely believe that I will not get that much better at directions. Its not like I've given up and no longer try but trying just seems to bring on diminishing returns. When I first came to Japan I decided I WILL get better, but getting lost for 3 hours on my bike two towns away...kinda killed that idea. But I can't live in a world hopeing there will be someone to guide me the right way. To me directions are like words to a dyslexic person, I understand the rules behind it, its just in my head they get all jumbled up and don't make any sense. I'm not a dumb person and I truely believe that as well, and I refuse to belive that not understanding directions makes me less of a person... but it does. And while it may take me alot of work, if a dyslexic person can eventually learn to read, I can eventually figure out left from right...
It had suddenly become freakishly hot and I alwasy thought the students are so dumb why am I the only one carrying something to drink? So with my juice in hand I climb up with the class 3 girls, which is the one class in which I am on more friendly terms with the boys (since they are rowdy and friendly and the girls are less so) So the boys all run up to talk to me, but eventually I try to seg-way to talk to the girls since I had talked with the class 3 boys like on two mountain climbs. (I'm trying to get through all the groups) So after awhile we are basicly running since we have to do some sort of eye brow check (Some rule about students must have eye brows...youd think this would not be a problem but more than a few boys have.....next to no eye brows =/)
So at this point some less in shape students look like they are about to pass out so I start offering them some juice, some accept and one girl who is really bad I basicly just give her the whole bottle. Even then its so bad the final leg of the climb I am dragging her up to ensure she doesnt fall off the mountain. On the way back down I'm popped I am losing my voice from combination screaming at classes and a cold, and I gave away most of my juice so I did something bad and ran away to get some vending machine drinks.
It was then another teacher told me, that drinks are banned untill summer. The students are supposed to suck it up since its cool and they can handle it. Its just insane, I couldnt belive it I mean like 3 girls in just the class I was walking with almost passed out. I thought what horrible rule. I'm not sure what I'm going to do about it but I will continue to break it (since no one told me it was a rule, even though I've bought something to drink with me every mountain climb) and pretend I still dont know because its not only dumb, but if the students can't carry somethign to drink I will surely give them some.
Also Shinnae visits my school and its fun, we go to kyudo club and bug the students. I was highly amused when the super tall awsome Kyudo girl (kayo) finds the shoes shinnae is wearing is really high, shes about the same height as shinnae without the shoes but with them on Shinnae looked much taller. When i pointed this out, she was kinda like CHEATER! Very funny as the girl is ussually SUPER shy and quiet. So I was amused.
So Saturday morning comes and Im feeling REALLY bad. I seriously lay in bed for awhile debating if I really wanna suck it up and go. But I do since if I dig out 4 other people are stuck without a ride. So I head over, and there are MASSIVE delays. We don't get out onto the road untill a good 2 hours later, and while on it I follow the other driver and in short we get pretty lost. (and I'm not even leading!) It gets so bad I land up leading (!!!!!) Of course this makes me nervous as I intended to just follow the other car blindly. So I get frazzled and bitchy and scared, since as you all know I have the world worst direction sense.
The whole trip is ok, but I basicly get sicker and sicker as it wears on, and by the next day I feel kinda like dying. I eventually get a bit better (after a bit of a hurl) and on the way back, I freak out since I'm sick, I don't know where I'm going and there are two back seat drivers telling me what to do. Which is good in a way because...I'm basicly like anti directions.
But I realize a bunch of things, I really need to calm down and stop freaking out when I drive. In Hawaii driving by myself, sometimes I would get lost for 3 hours. Which is pretty insane for an island that is so small you could probably drive around it in 1-2 hours. (well the part of the island with roads...) And I basicly accepted a long time ago I'm really bad at directions and sometimes things like that happen.
But in Japan its way scary, becuase getting lost will not lead you in circles it will lead you to god knows two prefectures away in some god forsaken land. And here there are time constraints, and people are almost always in my car. So I freak out and I don't know what to do and I get angry. I'm kinda sick of this feeling of pressure, as I'm a SUPER laid back person with very very little stress in my life. But, I can't just pretend to live a life with the attitude of, whatever comes I'll handle it. I really need to take hold of my life and steer in on my own. I just ussually let my life flow in the relaxed way that is common to Hawaii. But in the real world such an attitude does not work.
In a way truely believe that I will not get that much better at directions. Its not like I've given up and no longer try but trying just seems to bring on diminishing returns. When I first came to Japan I decided I WILL get better, but getting lost for 3 hours on my bike two towns away...kinda killed that idea. But I can't live in a world hopeing there will be someone to guide me the right way. To me directions are like words to a dyslexic person, I understand the rules behind it, its just in my head they get all jumbled up and don't make any sense. I'm not a dumb person and I truely believe that as well, and I refuse to belive that not understanding directions makes me less of a person... but it does. And while it may take me alot of work, if a dyslexic person can eventually learn to read, I can eventually figure out left from right...
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